Spinster

I've been wondering lately, "Do I even want to get married?"  So it was opportune timing that I chanced upon Spinster by Katie Bolick.  She actually wrote a very popular and highly debated article called "All the Single Ladies" for Atlantic magazine several years ago.  Much like the article, it was very difficult to get through.  Have you read it?

I judge books by their covers.  I thought that I was really going to enjoy this book.  I was expecting humor, and some reassurance that women could have fulfilling lives without marrying.  Ms. Bolick shared bits of her personal life interwoven with lives of 5 "awakeners," other historical literary women who were known for their single lifestyles at one point or another.  It took me three weeks to finish and I can't remember anything that really stood out to me.  She's been in serious relationship and even had marriage proposals.  In spite of her age, she will not settle down for so-so.  Conversely for me, the book has had the opposite effect of making me want to be in a relationship and show her that marriage can be a good thing.  It's in the Bible too.  Ecclesiastes 4: 9-12

⁹ Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed. ¹⁰ If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But someone who falls alone is in real trouble. ¹¹ Likewise, two people lying close together can keep each other warm. But how can one be warm alone? ¹² A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken.

I am all about self-empowerment and actualization.  If you've got this burning desire to be a writer or advance or pursue some noble cause, you should put all your time and resources into that lifelong project.  In fact, it might not be fair for your partner if you do get involved and then neglect them altogether once they've been wooed and won over.  But if you aren't really committed to something higher, what are you doing with your singleness?  If you merely live for yourself, you are sure to be unsatisfied.  Part of this has to do with the sermon I've been listening to this week from Pastor Rick Warren called "Daring to Commit."

I am very sorry for the discombobulated thoughts.  My brain is exhausted from all this pondering.

*  I received this book from Blogging for Books for review